Need help, I think I fucked up.

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Goofy

Banned
Fuck.

Monday afternoon, didn't shave balls in 2 weeks, kind of hairy. Had free time, decided to shave balls. Only had a safety razor handy. At this point I said yolo let's do this.


All was going well, got to balls region. I'm holding my sack to make sure balls skin is rigid af. Gliding smoothly like in the gillette adds.

All of a sudden there's a big noise in my house, some plate fell down in the kitchen. Mind you I was alone at home. Got scared and jumped a little. Fuck. Look down blood is pissing from ball sack.

Shit fuck. I grab toilet paper and put it over. In 5 sec hole paper I grabbed is full of blood. Grab more. Same thing.


Shit losing to much blood. Start to feel dizzy.

I put pressure on ball sack to stop bleeding while I run to my first aid kit to get the bleeding stopper cream. Rub that cream on balls, bleeding stops.

Now, I have a huge cut on ball sack. I analyzed my ball sack and I think I can see my actual nut. Wtf.

Fuck I really don't know what to do. Should I go to the emergency? I don't want to look retarded. Like you get there and they ask you what do you have and I say I cut my ball sack they are going to laugh at me. Plus I don't want the doctor to touch my nuts.

Like what if bleeding starts back, I faint and die ?


Mr pls help.

Can post pics of cut but rather not.


Srs need advice.


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Tu troll c'est evident... Tu t'es ouvert la poche jusqu'à ce que tu vois tes testicules pis tu te demandes si tu dois aller à l'urgence???

Pis tu t'es coupé avec un safety blade en plus?? Impossible, meme avec des feathers on peut pas se couper avec ca

Moi je veux des pics
 
Tu troll c'est evident... Tu t'es ouvert la poche jusqu'à ce que tu vois tes testicules pis tu te demandes si tu dois aller à l'urgence???

Pis tu t'es coupé avec un safety blade en plus?? Impossible, meme avec des feathers on peut pas se couper avec ca

Moi je veux des pics

Have you ever used a safety razor ? Like I said, I jumped and the edge of the razor blade cut through my nut sack.
 
Non non va pas à l'urgence, met un soulier sur tes couilles et prends une photo as proof

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sloth-yawn-cute.gif
 
Hahahaha for some reason I lost it at "Shit Fuck." Hahaha

Jesus I started reading this between two bench press series and I couldn't lift for ahit after cause I was laughing alone like an idiot hahaha
 
Ok, small update.

Called ambulance, bystander didn't believe me and was giggling, she tough it was a prank/joke. She finally believed me and sent an ambulance. She guided me she directed me and gave me instructions. She said to put ice on my balls, she clearly doesn't know what that means. Anyways I did so.

For fuck sake that's not fun. Anyways ambulance arrived 10-15min after.

2 girls, holy fuck how that was awkward. They get in with their fucking huge ass first aid kit. They bandaged my balls. Let me tell you, getting a boner was not an option, if you of knew all the nasty shit I had to think of to not get a boner. One was holding my shaft up while the other one applied disinfectant and bandaged my ball sack. So fucking hard not to get hard. I actually imagined LG naked and my cock went straight up flacid like an over boiled asparagus. I guess I have to tank LG for that one. Anyways they got my junk rapped up and they strapped me to the long ass thing on wheels. Put me in the ambulance and yeah drove up to lakeshore hospital.

Got to the hospital and doctor came and see me after a while. I need stitches on my nut sack.

Battery is dying, hope I make it through. If not, well, I guess that's the end of the line for me.

Wish me luck, hope it doesn't get infected and they need to remove hole ball sack.


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I heard of this happening to ppl before. You should be fine but you need to disinfect it. Put after shave on your nuts. full srs. If bleeding restarts go to emergency.

#PrayForGoofy
 
Ben oui, en 1h t'as eu le temps de te questionner si ta situation, reflechir, appeler l'ambulance, te faire patcher, te faire transporter et te faire stitcher

On s'entend que dans la vraie vie tu aurais attendu 48h à l'urgence
 
Ben oui, en 1h t'as eu le temps de te questionner si ta situation, reflechir, appeler l'ambulance, te faire patcher, te faire transporter et te faire stitcher

On s'entend que dans la vraie vie tu aurais attendu 48h à l'urgence

Not stitched yet.

They saw me and said I will need stitches.

A patient with severe bleeding will pass in front of other non fatal injuries. Plus, know one of the doctors at the hospital.
 
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